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The first time it happened was when I was in the bar area of
the Lander Community Center during a Whiteheart charity fund-raiser to benefit
disabled veterans. I was in the process
of ordering a glass of IPA beer and some white wine for Nancy.
“Are you
packing?”
I did not
think the question was meant for me. I
kept minding my own business.
“Are you
packing,” the voice to my left continued.
I looked over
and here was a nice-looking female. She was the one asking the question.
When my look
back at her was obviously a confused one, she asked me a third time: “Are you
packing?” She pointed to the holster
attached to my belt on my right side.
I turned and
showed her it was just my cell phone.
“Oh,” she
said, “I thought you were packing a gun, wearing a holster like that.”
“No, it’s just
my cell phone,” I answered.
Now I pal
around with a lot of guys who really are armed most of the time. Some carry
guns in their boots, some in hidden holsters and sometimes, right on their
belts.
I have not
gotten into the habit of packing a firearm even though my wife thinks we own
too many guns. Not sure it would be safe for me or the folks around me.
But that gal’s
question about my cell phone holster got me thinking.
Does wearing a
cell phone on my belt make me an old fogey? Am I out of fashion?
Most of the
other old goats at the Fox News All-Stars coffee group wear cell phone holsters
just like me.
So I started
looking around and noticed that just about anybody under the age of 60, well, is
not packing a cell phone in a holster.
They either keep them in their pockets or stuck somewhere. That holster
that I have fondly used for 25 years seems decidedly out of fashion flavor.
Thus, the
reason the gal asked if I was packing was that no doubt nobody in her immediate
circle used a cell phone holster. And probably never had.
Has the cell
phone holster gone the way of the pocket protector?
Now to young
folks who have no idea what I am talking about, when I was in school back in the
1950s and 1960s, every teacher and most professional adults wore a plastic
pocket that fit inside a shirt pocket and that was where you kept your pens, pencils,
paper clips and whatever. It was handy.
About the end
of last century (from 1985 to 1990) the pocket protector went out of fashion
for good. You never see them any more.
Even I know they broadcast a certain fashion statement that is not a compliment.
During my
research of cell phones, I noticed that every little girl (aged 8 or higher) or
older gals, too, packs her cell phone in the back pocket of her jeans. The phone sticks halfway out and apparently
was jammed into something called an Otterbox ™. The name Otterbox means it was strong,
as iron and the phone would never break even when you sat on it, which happens
a lot.
There are an
inordinate number of women of all ages who pack their phones and car keys
around and stack them somewhere in their immediate vicinity when they are
drinking coffee, having a drink or practicing yoga.
For some
reason, lately, I have been hearing a lot about gals dropping their phones into
the toilet. Seems that if you soak your wet phone in dry rice, sometimes you can
save them. Who would have guessed?
Seems to me
that I need to get back on the fashion track. Not sure how I will replace my
cell phone holster – it is too small for one of my handguns.
I can’t imagine
putting my phone into an Otterbox and sticking into my back pocket. Sounds
crazy and not very comfortable.
I know one
young gal in her 30s who sticks her phone in her bra – no kidding.
A few years
ago I passed an age milestone, which caused me to write the following in a
column back then: “Am I finally at that age when I can wear my pants with the
belt up around my chest?”
Perhaps the more
meaningful question was: “Does this mean I can finally wear black socks and
formal shoes with my walking shorts?”
Just trying to
keep up with appropriate fashion trends.
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